We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
