Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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