did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize