Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
