wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
