He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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