homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize
