I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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