Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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