sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
