i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
