toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
