You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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