Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
