i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
