somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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