member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize