Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
