in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize