I hate your face
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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