I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
he told me I talked like a deaf person
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
