She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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