so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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