that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
