You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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