she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
