hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
