Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
It's just like the Real World with babies
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
