WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
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