..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
