I'm eating all of the evidence.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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