Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
