Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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