do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
