they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
