I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
