is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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