Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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