ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize
