When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Randomize
