Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
