4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
