Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
