...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
