i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
