The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
