bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
All I want is dick and wine.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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