The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
This couple is walking their pig around campus
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
