she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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