Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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